Is your Mental Attitude Holding You Back?

Ever notice that the most successful people have strong positive attitudes?  They're what I like to call "mentally strong" and some people are born and raised that way, others need to learn to develop a PMA (positive mental attitude).  Mentally strong people have healthy habits. They manage their emotions, thoughts, and behaviors in ways that set them up for success in life. Check out these things that mentally strong people don’t do so that you too can become more mentally strong.

1. They don’t waste time feeling sorry for themselves
Mentally strong people don’t sit around feeling sorry about their circumstances or how others have treated them. Instead, they take responsibility for their role in life and understand that life isn't always easy or fair.  Sure, have the occasional pity party but DO NOT stay there!  Put on the big girl/boy panties and figure out how to get out of the problem and into the solution.

2. They don’t give away their power
They don’t allow others to control them, and they don’t give someone else power over them. They don’t say things like, “My boss makes me feel bad,” because they understand that they are in control over their own emotions and they have a choice in how they respond.  People can only make you feel bad IF you allow them to....make that choice.

3. They don’t shy away from change
Mentally strong people don’t try to avoid change. Instead, they welcome positive change and are willing to be flexible. They understand that change is inevitable and believe in their abilities to adapt. I know, the older we get the harder that is to do as we become pretty set in our ways BUT in order to move forward, we need to embrace change.

4. They don’t waste energy on things they can’t control
You won’t hear a mentally strong person complaining over lost luggage or traffic jams. Instead, they focus on what they can control in their lives. They recognize that sometimes, the only thing they can control is their attitude.  One of my favorite expressions in circumstances like this is "It is what it is....." and I move on....kind of like the Serenity Prayer.

5. They don’t worry about pleasing everyone
Mentally strong people recognize that they don’t need to please everyone all the time, it's not possible. They’re not afraid to say no or speak up when necessary because that's part of what doing right by others and ourselves. They strive to be kind and fair, but can handle other people being upset if they didn't make them happy.

6. They don’t fear taking calculated risks
They don’t take reckless or foolish risks, but don’t mind taking calculated risks. Mentally strong people spend time weighing the risks and benefits, pros and cons, before making a big decision with eyes wide open and they’re fully informed of the potential downsides before they take action.

7. They don’t dwell on the past
Mentally strong people don’t waste time dwelling on the past and wishing things could be different because the past can not be changed. They acknowledge their past and can say what they've learned from it, the lessons that were included in that package called the past. However, they don’t constantly relive bad experiences or fantasize about the glory days either. Instead, they live for the present and plan for the future. Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery and today is the present....enjoy that gift!

8. They don’t make the same mistakes over and over
Mentally strong people accept responsibility for their behavior and learn from their past mistakes. As a result, they don’t keep repeating those mistakes over and over. Instead, they move on and make better decisions in the future.  If you're making the same mistakes over and over, maybe it's time to sit down and figure out what the lesson is that you're needing to learn.

9. They don’t resent other people’s success
Mentally strong people can appreciate and celebrate other people’s success in life. They don’t grow jealous or feel cheated when others surpass them. Instead, they recognize that success comes with hard work, and they are willing to work hard for their own chance at success and in fact are willing to learn from those who have that success.

10. They don’t give up after the first failure
Mentally strong people don’t view failure as a reason to give up (unless it was skydiving). Instead, they use failure as an opportunity to learn from, to grow and improve. They are willing to keep trying until they get it right.  

11. They don’t fear alone time
Mentally strong people can tolerate being alone and they don’t fear silence. They aren’t afraid to be alone with their thoughts and they can use downtime to be productive. They enjoy their own company and aren't dependent on others for companionship and entertainment all the time but instead can be happy alone because they are comfortable in their own skin and have inner peace and trust that everything is as it should be.  

12. They don’t feel the world owes them anything
Mentally strong people don’t feel "entitled" to things in life like it's just automatically owed to them. They weren’t born with a mentality that others would take care of them or that the world must give them something. Instead, they look for opportunities based on their own merits.

13. They don’t expect immediate results
Whether they are working on improving their health or getting a new business off the ground, mentally strong people don’t expect immediate results.  Instead, they apply their skills and time to the best of their ability and understand that real change takes time....sometimes lots of time.  

Source: Life Hack via Endo Riot

What do you do when you don't feel motivated?

It happens to all of us at some point or other, we just wake up lacking the energy to do anything. Not wanting to get out of bed, not wanting to stay in it either. That's normal. That's the stuff of life, so to speak. What is not normal though is getting entangled with lack of energy, lack of drive, lack of motivation. What is not normal is to continuously talk yourself into the act of not doing anything. But what do you do when all the drive inside of you are purged out? Maybe you can begin with the following 4 recommendations.

Think of the worst-case scenario - We have all been told that envisioning success is a good motivator. Now, why not do the exact opposite? Why not envision a future that is bleak, hopeless and stripped off all happiness and success. Why not envision yourself living eternally in a rut where sense of accomplishment and a tiny hope are nonexistent?

Scary, right? Very few people realize that they possess a one-way ticket towards this very vision. Now what you want to do is to get off your butt and work your way out of the train wreck you are heading towards. Turn your life around and work for a goal. Now, that is getting motivated!

Set a date for change and commit to it - Change must come to everyone of us. Sometimes it is forced upon us, sometimes we choose when it will happen, sometimes we just hit a crossroad in our lives and know that SOMETHING has to change. It's always much more preferable to have control over the change that can take us over and if the change you are seeking requires a specific date on the calendar, then set it. Make a huge, red circle around the date and stick with it. Let this serve as a motivator to start doing the things you should have done weeks, months or years ago. Let this chosen date serve as the new beginning of your life.

Break the routine - When you're doing the same thing every day, sooner or later, the energy that you once had will drain out. No matter how passionate you were with your work, project, or goal when you were just beginning, you will suffer from lack of motivation once your body senses that it is doing the same thing day in, day out.

Don’t be afraid to break the routine once in a while. Quit work for a full day. Stop doing your routine for a week. Take a month-long vacation. Take on a new hobby for a year. These can help energize you and rekindle your drive. And while you're taking your break from your routine, don’t lose the faith that you will have the same kind of energy you once had by the time you get back to work.

Don’t lose sight of your goals - It is easy to lose your focus when there is too much distraction around. Whether it's the kids, clutter at your work area, Twitter or Facebook, you will find that these simple things remind you of other things that can drive your concentration away from the task at hand. To prevent yourself from killing your own motivation, always try to stick with your goals and shut out whatever it is that it trying to reduce it.